Yes, I realize that every morning gives us all the opportunity for a fresh start, but there really is something refreshing about a New Year.  If there wasn’t, there wouldn’t be a whole pile of people signing up for gym memberships this week.

I won’t be one of those people.

But only because I live 30 minutes from Hibbing and it would make zero sense for me to drive into town after work and then head back home.  Especially when I have a dog that requires me to spell out w-a-l-k.  Along with millions of other Americans, I will once again set a goal to get back into shape.  That’s just a given.  But what about some other resolutions?  How have old ones panned out for me?

On New Year’s Day 1998, I made a simple resolution that I think I’m going to use again – when faced with a decision, make the right choice.

Yeah, apparently 1997 was a year of poor choices…

2011 wasn’t, but I know I  can do better.  And so can all of us.

One of my biggest frustrations in life is with folks who don’t believe they have the power to affect their lives.  Those people are considered E-LOC people.  LOC stands for Locus of Control (click here for more information).  Some of us are I-LOC (Internal LOC)  individuals who believe we are in control of our destiny whereas E-LOC (External) folks believe that life controls them.  I have this sneaking suspicion that many of us who create resolutions that we actually strive to meet are I-LOCers.

In 2012, I can achieve most of my goals if I remember that 1998 resolution and how I have that power to make decisions for myself.  We can’t control our circumstances always.  Stuff happens.  How do we deal with those so-called curveballs that life throws at all?  Do we whine about the unfairness of life or do we roll with it?  Do we control what is within our power to control?  And for those circumstances that aren’t in our control, do we remember that we still are granted the power to choose our response?

I’m only half-joking when I say I have a thousand resolutions, meaning that I have about 500.  Eat more fruits and veggies.  Swear less.  Break my addiction to Plants vs. Zombies.

Well, I should try to accomplish at least 2 of those 3.  And I won’t say which will be the most challenging.

Seriously though, the year is sitting in front of us all and although nothing magical ever happens at midnight (from what I can remember from the years I stayed awake for it!), this could be the year something magical happens to you.

The challenge will be in recognizing that you’re the magician who needs to make it happen.

Happy New Year to all of you and best wishes on achieving the goals you’ve set out for yourself!

For my 27th Day of Giving, I gave thanks for always having a place to live as a kid by donating to Life House in Duluth.  Life House helps out homeless youth in NE Minnesota and is the only drop-in center for them in the area.  There are a lot of kids who didn’t get blessed with responsible parents and we can’t turn our backs on them.  How we respond as a community to these kids will shape the adults they become.  If they feel that someone does care, they will stand a much better chance of becoming responsible adults who believe in themselves.  A lot of us are completely clueless about subcultures that exist around us.  Many of us never have had to worry about parents who abused drugs or alcohol or neglected us for other reasons.  I don’t know that I blame them for running away from “home” but I do blame us if we turn our backs on them and say that they aren’t our kids so we don’t need to worry about them.  We complain about our taxes going to welfare or to pay for prisons, so why don’t we be proactive and help some of these high-risks kids out now so they can instead become respected colleagues and friends of our children?

_________________________________

On the opposite end of the age spectrum – for my 28th Day of Giving, I chose to support Meals on Wheels and give thanks for the seniors in my life that pass on their wisdom and love to me.  A few elderly folks I know rely on this service for a warm home-cooked meal 5 days a week.  They are lucky enough to still live in their homes, but they aren’t able to easily get to the grocery store.  Not only is that a challenge, but it isn’t easy to cook for one without either having no diversity in meals or wasting a lot of food.  Meals for Wheels is also great for seniors because it ensures that once a day someone is checking up on that person and making sure they’re alright.  If things go well, all of us will be old at some point and we may be that person who needs help with meals.  Senior hunger is a real problem and our love can’t always flow downhill to our children.

_________________________________

Many families had an empty chair at their table this Christmas with their loved one deployed overseas in the military.  For my 29th Day of Giving, I give thanks to those families for their sacrifice by donating to Beyond the Yellow Ribbon.  This program aims to provide support to the families and servicemembers who bear the burden for protecting all of us.  We may not always agree with the missions that they are on, but we should reserve our judgement for the politicians who place them there.  I know that I would never be brave enough to sign up for the military and I doubt that I would remain strong if my husband or son/daughter were deployed to dangerous places.  They are there for all of us and for that I am grateful.  Beyond the Yellow Ribbon helps to support those families and we should as communities and neighbors.  If we haven’t been in their shoes, we will never understand the stress of a deployment or the patriotism that drives these servicemembers and their families to make the ultimate sacrifice.  To donate to the cause, click here for a list of organizations that are helping out and pick the one that best fits you.

_________________________________

Where would I be without teachers?  I loved school and am surprised at times that I never went to school to be a teacher.  With gratitude for those amazing folks, I chose to support them on my 30th Day of Giving by donating to Adopt-a-Classroom where you can be matched up with a teacher that could use your financial help.  You can even select if you’d like it to go to a school with a high percentage of children at poverty level.  I would also like to encourage teachers who read this to sign up your classrooms so that those of us wh0 want to help you out are more easily able to do so.  So many people complain about teachers, but do they really think they could do a better job guiding 15-25 young, energetic children?  I’m sure there are a few bad ones out there, just as in any profession, but the vast majority are doing their best to shape our next generation.  They manage to teach while also dealing with children who are tired, hungry, abused, mentally ill or on the flip side, spoiled rotten brats!  Seriously though, they don’t always get to hear thank you’s from students or parents for being one of the most important people in that child’s life.  Let’s be thankful for them and not only “give them a hand” but also lend them one.

__________________________________

Finally, with nothing but thanks for my incredible husband, I selected Wish Upon a Wedding for my 31st and last Day of Giving.  I was pretty good at shrugging off the importance of marriage in my 20s, not really understanding how powerful the right marriage can be.  I “get” it now and I also get how important it is to announce your commitment  and share your joy with your family and friends.  Wish Upon a Wedding is a nonprofit organization that provides weddings and vow renewals to couples facing terminal illnesses and serious life-altering circumstances.  Everyone who wants it deserves that day where you stand in front of everyone that cares about you and you publicly commit to love your one person for the rest of your lives.  I cried throughout our entire wedding, from the minute I started walking down the aisle to the end where we walked back down it together as husband and wife and neither one of us was even facing an illness!  I want other people to be able to experience that overwhelming joy and love!

______________________________

So there it ends, my 31 Days of Giving.  I wish I could have done justice to all of the different organizations, but somedays I just wasn’t able to get to my computer.  I hope you all learned about a few new organizations.  I know I did!  It was tough at times because the need in the world is neverending and I felt absolutely powerless.  But then I was able to feel empowered by being able to support people that have dedicated their lives to making life easier for others.

I get so frustrated with the world, all the hate and cruelty, but the beauty and love is there if you look for it.

Bless the artists.

Bless the music, the paintings, the sculptures, the written word.

Bless the beauty.

It can’t all be about survival.

What is survival without joy and where is joy without art?

________________________________

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.”  – Pablo Picasso

For my 22^nd -26^th Days of Giving, I chose to support the Arts by supporting the following organizations: Virginia Community Foundation, The Reif Center, Lyric Center for the Arts, Minnesota Discovery Center and Minnesota Public Radio.

An upsetting number of people enjoy disparaging Northern Minnesota by saying that we don’t have any culture up here.

Bah humbug.

Open your eyes.  Open their eyes.

Being that we don’t have kids, we occasionally get referred to as DINKs (double income, no kids) but I prefer to think of Matt as a PUNK and myself as a PANK (professional uncle/aunt, no kids).  We love our nephew and nieces and feel grateful to get to play a role in their lives as they grow up.  We hope that as they get older they will come to us for guidance on questions they don’t feel comfortable asking their parents, will lean on us when they need another set of shoulders and will always remember that we have their backs (and best interests in mind).  Our world wouldn’t be the same without them.  It’d definitely be way too quiet!

So in honor of Nick, Kaitlinn, Rayna, Isabella, and Riata (in chronological order), we are choosing to dedicate our 17-21^st Days of Giving to the five organizations below.

St. Mary’s Children’s Hospital Newborn Intensive Care Unit (NICU)

Occasionally babies pop into this world sooner than scheduled.  When this happens, it takes solid expertise to help the babies finish their development.  It also takes a dedicated team to help the parent(s) through an incredibly stressful time.  I always thought that the nearest NICU unit was in the Twin Cities, so thank you to Derek G. for telling me his happy-ending story about his son who arrived too soon and was helped out at the Duluth hospital.  It completely blows my mind that babies as small as one pound can be saved and go on to live normal lives.  How many families have been saved from tragedy by this NICU and others throughout the country?

The Essentia Health’s SMDC Foundation is currently raising $2.5 million for a new 18-room Newborn Intensive Care Unit. For more information, or to donate, visit Essentia Health’s SMDC Foundation.

St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital

What could make a parent feel more hopeless (and perhaps helpless) than having their child diagnosed with cancer or another devastating disease?  St. Jude is the patron saint of hopeless causes and is the saint that Danny Thomas chose to pray to as a young man for guidance in his life.  Mr. Thomas vowed that if he got his act together, he would build a shrine to St. Jude.  He did get his act together, became a famous entertainer, and he never forgot his promise.  St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital is the result of this promise and treats, on average, 5900 children every year.  The overall survival rate for childhood cancers has gone from less than 20% in 1962, the year St. Jude’s opened to 80% today thanks in part to the research that has been conducted there.  Every child deserves to have hope and every family deserves to watch their children grow older.

Children’s Cancer Research Fund

The more brains, the better, especially when researching the prevention, treatment and cures for childhood cancers.  The Children’s Cancer Research Fund provides funding to the University of Minnesota specifically for those purposes.  Their focus is on pioneering research initiatives that lead to larger studies, including clinical trials for brain tumor vaccines.  If you can handle crying right now, I highly suggest you read this story about a little girl named Chloe who beat her leukemia and grew up to win the 2006 American Quarter Horse Youth Association world championship in barrel racing.  With four little nieces that love horses, Chloe’s story hit way too close to home.  Supporting the Children’s Cancer Research Fund allows researchers to develop new treatments, such as the umbilical cord blood transplant that saved Chloe’s life.  Not every kid will grow up to be the person who finally cures cancer, but this organization helps make it possible for more children to have a chance to grow up to be that person.

HURU International

This next organization is going to cause a few people to raise their eyebrows and there will be a few people who will feel squicky, but this cause is too important to young women for me to ignore and not discuss (especially with four very important girls in my life!).

There are few things more important to me than educating young women throughout the world.  An educated woman has freedom.  Freedom to choose her own path in life, freedom to not have to stay in a destructive relationship, freedom to be herself. Huru is the Swahili word for freedom and Huru International strives to grant young women in Africa freedom by providing a very simple object to them that many of us usually don’t think twice about – sanitary napkins (aka pads).  Lots of folks don’t like to think about or discuss menstruation – too bad.  Menstruation is a fact of life, but let’s face it, it’s not one we get excited about for obvious reasons.

So imagine being a young woman trying to go to school so that you can improve your life and escape a future of poverty, but once a month you have to miss school for several days all because you have your period and no sanitary way to deal with it.  For $25, Huru will give one young woman an equal opportunity at schooling by providing one kit in a backpack that includes reusable sanitary napkins (good for one year), underwear, soap, a storage bag and educational materials.

So women menstruate.  So what?  That definitely isn’t enough reason for us to not be educated just like those who don’t!

Make-a-Wish Foundation

Since 1980, the Make-a-Wish Foundation has granted 215,899 wishes.  That number increases by 1 every 40 minutes!  Wishes are granted to children that have been diagnosed with life-threatening medical conditions (it’s a myth that they are all terminal according to the website).  The wishes vary from trips to fire station bedrooms to seeing snow to anything you can imagine.  It’s not a hard concept to “get behind”.  We all have dreams and wishes and we’ve all played the games of “bucket lists” and “if you won the lottery what would you do first?”  When a family faces the prospect of losing a child, they deserve an escape from that pain and stress.  The child deserves the purest joy they can experience.  Make-a-Wish makes that happen.  Let’s help them make that happen.

Note: These are the 17th-21st posts in a series of 31 highlighting donation opportunities this holiday season.  

I remember feeling embarrassed in college because my car was old, really old.  Only 2 years newer than me actually.  It was so old it didn’t have fuel injection (or power windows and locks or a/c).  My friends all had significantly newer vehicles and although I loved my car, I couldn’t help but be envious of others.  I used to get frustrated that my parents wouldn’t buy me a nicer car and as a college student, I had no chance of buying a better one for myself.

“Mom, I NEED a new car.  This car is sooo old.”

Need?

If you’re reading this, you’re rich.  Take joy in what you have and recognize that you really could have it much much worse.

You can get mad at me for saying this or you can take a step back and ask yourself, “how can I improve the situation for one person today who genuinely has it much worse than me because as an American, I’m doing pretty swell.  My needs are on a different scale.  And I have the ability to powerfully lower someone’s needs on this Earth we share.”

Don’t have a cow.  Give one.  Literally.

Yes, I’m serious.

Heifer International is an organization that allows you to do just that.  Give a cow.  Or a camel.  Or some honeybees.  Or some… well, check out the options, they are pretty diverse.  In their own words, “With gifts of livestock and training, Heifer projects help families improve their nutrition and generate income in sustainable ways. We refer to the animals as “living loans” because in exchange for their livestock and training, families agree to give one of its animal’s offspring to another family in need. It’s called Passing on the Gift – a cornerstone of our mission that creates an ever-expanding network of hope and peace.”

It may sound kinda’ crazy, but think about the awesomeness of this opportunity.  You are providing sustenance for a family that will appreciate it.  A family with a need that goes beyond our needs, no matter how great we feel they are.  For those of you who are vegetarian or vegan and feel squeamish about giving a living animal to someone knowing that it will most likely be eaten, there are other options, such as trees that you can check out as well.

It’s not a handout.  It’s a hand-up.  You can’t teach a man to fish if there are no fish to start with.  Provide the fish, provide a future.

Thank you to Lindsay E. and Lisa W. who both independently recommended that I check out this organization for my 16th Day of Giving.  This donation is for the both of you who generously give your time and resources to make this world a better place.

Note: This is the sixteenth post in a series of 31 highlighting donation opportunities this holiday season. 

If there’s one thing I’ve learned this month, it’s that there is no end to amazing organizations that need our help and amazing people who have dedicated their lives to helping others.  Trying to decide what organizations to support can be very overwhelming and disappointing because it’s easy to feel that your money is so insignificant compared to the need.

In reality, the money I’m donating this month is completely insufficient to make any dent.  But when one person’s money is matched by another’s is matched by another’s and so on, then you really CAN make a difference.

That’s why I support the United Way of NE Minnesota every payday, including on my 15^th Day of Giving.  Not only do I have the ease of having the donation directly taken from my paycheck before I even know I have that money, but I also get to be a part of a larger movement to help out a wide variety of groups in our area.  By myself, I have limited ability to help, but united with my coworkers and community members, we have the power to change the dynamics of our community in a positive way.

The variety of organizations supported by the United Way is truly impressive (over 61 in NE MN!) and can be viewed here.  There are organizations that support “Meeting Basic Needs” such as the Second Harvest Northern Lakes Food Bank and the Red Cross, organizations that “Support Health and Independence” such as the East Range DAC and Range Respite and organizations that “Nurture Children and Families” such as Range Women’s Advocates and Smiles Across Minnesota.  In recognition of the fact that there are some organizations that folks specifically want their donation to go to and others that they would prefer not to support for various reasons, the United Way now allows you the opportunity to direct your donation either to or from groups if you so desire.  (So there goes that excuse!)

136,000 people received assistance from United Way agencies last year and 99 cents of every dollar donated stayed on the Iron Range.  There is no question that there is a need out there in our community.  The only question is: will you stand united with your Iron Range neighbors to combat this need?

Note: This is the fifteenth post in a series of 31 highlighting donation opportunities this holiday season. 

I am NOT a huge fan of needles, but really, who is? I’m also fairly fond of my blood staying within the confines of my skin where I feel it belongs. I’ve invested a lot into it, so I tend to want to keep it. However, I don’t NEED all of it. We all have between 10-12 pints of it and when you donate blood, they only take 1 pint. So I try to be brave and give up the 1 pint when I’m qualified (I’ve struggled with anemia at times), knowing that my body won’t take long to regenerate it.

Last time I donated, I posted on Facebook that I had saved three lives that day. At first I had actually impressed some folks who I think envisioned me pulling people out of a burning car or something equally dramatic, and while that would be super cool, I had, in reality, simply walked into the Memorial Blood Center office in Hibbing and rolled up my sleeve. There are three critical components to our blood – platelets, red blood cells, and plasma – and all three can be used to save lives.

The shocking thing is that 1 out of every 3 of us will need a blood transfusion at some point in our lives and it isn’t always the result of a horrific car crash or other accidental release. Not everyone is capable of donating, either due to their own illnesses or risk factors, so that means that those of us who are physically capable need to step up to the plate. We can’t stand to the side and say we’re too scared of needles to donate. Put yourself in the shoes of the parent whose child’s life is hanging in the balance or the wife whose husband is going into surgery. What’s scarier? A needle poke or facing the possible death of your loved one because too many people were afraid of a needle?

Does it feel weird to donate? Yeah, sometimes for me it does. I will admit that I always look away when they are putting the needle in and sometimes it’s a little disconcerting to see a bag filling up with my blood. I’m usually a little sleepy the next day, but that might just be a sort of placebo effect – I might just think I’m supposed to feel sleepy and use it as a good excuse to get Matt to be extra nice to me.

After 9/11 a lot of people donated for the first time (myself included), but it’s been 10 years now. How many of you have struggled to find the time to head over to Memorial Blood Center?

It’s an hour of your time for 3 lives.

And did I mention the cookies and juice?

They are delicious

Note: This is the fourteenth post in a series of 31 highlighting donation opportunities this holiday season.

Or that I’m not that stylish as an adult…

Pets come with a whole set of benefits that ideally outweigh the headaches and heartaches.  They lower blood pressure, listen without judging and love unconditionally.  They keep you in shape – “if your dog is fat, you’re not getting enough exercise.”  They cuddle when you need it.  Wag their tails when they see you (okay, maybe just the dogs, but…).

Some may consider this cheating for my project, but there are 3 animal shelters that have come to my pets’ rescue and one that just started up and could probably use some help, so this entry counts for 4 days.

My 10th day of giving is in honor of Dakota, who I love even though she’s not a shelter dog (nobody’s perfect).  She’s the world’s most perfect dog (don’t I sound like a parent?) and will be damn near impossible to ever try to replace.  There is a new animal shelter in Chisholm called Precious Paws Humane Society – 101 1st Avenue SW (kittycorner from Jubilee) - 218-254-3300 and our next pet (which hopefully we won’t get for a long time because it will mean one of ours has passed away) will come from it.  Lest you think I’m a bad parent, she really likes her crate and chooses to sleep in it even though she has beds scattered throughout the house.

Our 11th Day of Giving is in honor of our most recent addition – Rocky – who we really should have named “Cuddles” or “Snuggle” or “Buttercup” so that he was better behaved.  We picked him out at the Range Regional Animal Rescue at 11215 Hwy 37 just out of Hibbing – 218-262-1900.  This photo is very deceptive.  He rarely cuddles, but occasionally he does wear himself out fighting with me, Matt, Dakota or Chloe.  The cat is a holy terror, but at least he has a home.

Our 12th Day of Giving is in honor of Chloe – aka Chloebird, little bird, and sweetie pie.  We scooped her up at the Mesabi Humane Society. She was a holy terror for the first few years, but is relatively calm now.  “Relatively”  She was meant to be Matt’s cat because her camoflauge is amazing!

Our 13th day of Giving is in memory of Oliver, who we had to put down on December 13, 2010.  It’s been a year, but the wound is still raw for me. He was saved by Contented Critters of Makinen 8 years ago and was a loyal buddy through the 7 years we had him in our home.  Not a day goes by that we don’t mention him.

There isn’t much I can say about these 4 days.  Some people love pets, some just don’t.  I do.  Our home is chaotic and we spend an inordinate amount of time having to vacuum up fur, but I wouldn’t trade that for anything.  I’m a pet person and as long as I’m married, I can hopefully avoid the “Crazy Cat Lady” description.

We owe it to animals to make sure they are spayed and neutered so our animal shelters don’t become overloaded.  We owe it to our animal shelters for bringing these critters off of the streets and into our homes.  Although our home can’t handle another pet, hopefully our donations (and yours!) can help these animals out until they can find their Forever Home.

When I was in 4th grade, I got schmucked by a thrown baseball bat and lost my front tooth.  The first tooth I was fitted with had to be replaced when I was about 16 or 17 and before it was replaced, I was picked on a decent amount by a few others because, honestly, it looked really bad.

But is that any excuse for being mean to me?

Is there ever an excuse for being mean to someone because of their looks?!

Let’s face it, a person’s appearance is usually a matter of luck.  Good or bad.  I get a lot of compliments on my hair, but it’s not like I can take any credit for it.  It was just luck to have a mutant MC1R. And while you may look at someone and find them unattractive, that’s just your opinion.  And there really is no need to share that.  It adds nothing to the universe.  Nothing.

I’ll never understand the need for some humans to be mean to others, either to others’ faces or behind their backs.  I usually attribute it to insecurity or pecking orders, but perhaps some people are simply jerks?  Can you imagine if the tables had been turned on you in life and there was something physically different about you that caused people to point at you and gasp?  Something that made people pity you or your parents?  Something that made others uncomfortable around you?  What if that something was able to be “fixed” but you couldn’t afford it so you were shunned, perhaps even by your own parents?

You’d probably hope and pray that someone would help you.

So how about being that person that does the helping?  Give thanks for your blessing of “normality” and help others achieve it.

___________________________________-

In Uganda, children that are born with a cleft lip or palate are named Ajok, which means “cursed by God.”  Cursed by God?!  Really?!  Excuse my inferred cursing, but WTF?  I try to be polite and not use profanity in my blog, but seriously, some things just push me over the edge and this is one of those.  And it’s not just in Uganda where children are shunned, it happens throughout the world.

For those of you who don’t know, cleft lip and cleft palate are common birth defects (source: Mayo Clinic) where either the upper lip or the palate are split apart.  The two sides simply didn’t finish joining up while the baby was in the womb.  That’s all.  No curse.  No reason to shun the child.  No reason to be cruel.  It just happens.  But when it happens to a family without the financial means to help the child, then a lot of problems can ensue.

The child may have a difficult time eating or speaking.  There may be hearing issues.  And of course, there is the fact that in some countries, they won’t be welcome at school or given a job as an adult.  All for something that they did not have a choice in.  And all for something that can be fixed relatively easy.

Smile Train provides the solution. A relatively simple surgery.  That’s all it can take to give these children and their families a little hope.

As their website says, “how often do you get to save a child’s life for $250?”  Have a group of friends over for some wine and apps with an “entry fee” of $25, pool the funds and provide a surgery for someone that will never know it was you that changed their life but who will forever be grateful.  If that’s out of your reach, even $25 will help pay for sutures.

Spread smiles throughout the globe, donate to Smile Train.

This 9th day of giving was inspired by a friend who was born with a cleft lip and palate and has had several surgeries throughout his life.  He has never let others’ expectations of him become his expectations for himself and I admire him greatly for that.

Note: This is the ninth post in a series of 31 highlighting donation opportunities this holiday season.